I took an old friend to the shops the other day to buy some new shoes (he is 76). We decided to grab a bite at a snack bar I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colours – green, red, orange and blue. My friend kept staring at her. The teenager kept looking and would find him staring every time. When the teenager had had enough, she sarcastically asked: “What’s the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?” Knowing my friend, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response; I knew he would have a good one! In classic style he responded without batting an eyelid …. “Got stoned once and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you might be my kid.”